Fun Times with Crazy Nobles

There is a current scandal with the South Korean President, Park Geun-hye, which is quite amusing and inspirational for a model of a 100% hijacked Ruling Monarch.

Essentially, a man, Choi Tae-min, became the ‘spirit guide’ and shamanic connection between Park Geun-hye and her dead mother – assassinated by a North Korean spy (who was aiming for her father).

Quotations from The Irrational Downfall of Park Geun-hye

Shortly after the assassination, the elder Choi sent several letters to Park Geun-hye, claiming that the soul of Park’s mother visited him, and Park could hear from her mother through him. Park invited Choi Tae-min to the presidential residence, and the elder Choi told her there that Park’s mother did not truly die, but merely moved out of the way to open the path for Park Geun-hye. This was the beginning of the unholy relationship between Park Geun-hye and Choi’s family, which included Choi Tae-min’s daughter Soon-sil.

Said Choi Tae-min used the connection for all the monetary value possible: and when he died, his daughter Choi Soon-sii took over the power and the money.

As it turned out, Choi Soon-sil owned Park Geun-hye just as much as her father did. Peddling the presidential influence, Choi extorted tens of millions of dollars from Korea’s largest corporations. When they found a small and profitable company, Choi’s cronies would straight-up steal it, threatening the owner of the company with the company’s destruction and personal harm. More importantly, Choi effectively controlled the presidential power. Every day, Choi would receive a huge stack of policy briefs from the presidential residence to discuss with her inner circle–an illustrious group that included Choi’s gigolo (no, really) and a K-pop music video director (I’m serious.) Choi would receive ultra-confidential information detailing secret meetings between South and North Korean military authorities. Choi would receive in advance the budget proposal of more than $150 million for the Ministry of Culture, Sports, and Tourism, and distributed them to her friends’ projects. Choi went around saying North Korea would collapse by 2017 according to the spirits that spoke to her, and the Park Geun-hye administration may have set its North Korea policy based on this claim.

Government policy, by witches and shamen.

For years, Park’s aides complained about the mysterious off-line person to whom the president would send her draft speeches–when the drafts returned, the professionally written speeches were turned into gibberish. We now know that one of Choi Soon-sil’s favorite activities was to give comments on the presidential speeches. Even the famous Dresden speech, in which Park Geun-hye outlined her administration’s North Korea policy, had a number of markups from Choi Soon-sil. The aides who dug too deep into the relationship between Park and Choi were dismissed and replaced with those close to Choi, to a point that Choi’s personal trainer became a presidential aide. No, really. I wish I were joking.

Well, at least no one’s head was delivered on a silver platter… that we know of…

It is entirely fitting that this sordid affair began unraveling because of a preferential treatment that Choi’s daughter received in her college admission. If there is one thing that Koreans cared more than their lives, it is their (and their children’s) college degree. As the heat rose against Choi and her daughter, they hightailed to Germany where they owned a horse farm.

Everyone has their red line. For the Koreans (and many other Asians), it isn’t God or National Security or even Sanity… it’s that college degree.

The major breakthrough occurred on October 24, when a cable TV network JTBC discovered a Galaxy Tab belonging to Choi Soon-sil in the office that she abandoned. The tablet was the Pandora’s Box–it had the presidential speeches with Choi’s markups, presidential briefs for cabinet meetings, appointment information for presidential aides, chat messages with presidential aides, the president’s vacation schedule, draft designs for commemorative stamps featuring the president, and much, much more. The discovery of the tablet was worthy of “World’s Dumbest Criminals”–the tablet was simply left behind in Choi’s office with no encryption, and the files were available for anyone to open. And just in case Choi Soon-sil denied ownership of the tablet, its image gallery contained her selfie.

This simply cries out for a Traveller adventure!

And yes, I am absolutely certain that somewhere in the Imperium, there’s some officially-stolid, secretly-nutty Imperial Noble with insanely explosive material just lying about unencrypted on some memory stick or unsecured smartphone/PDA.

Meanwhile, Korean people’s collective heads exploded. As discussed earlier, it takes quite a bit for Korean politics to shock the Korean people. Having survived a particularly tumultuous modern democratic history, Korean people may be the world’s most cynical consumers of politics. But this. Even the most cynical Koreans were not ready for this.

There are times when the most cynical of us are simply blown out of the water.

At first, there was a tiny bit of perverse relief, as all the bizarre actions of Park Geun-hye administration suddenly began to make sense. Why did the president only hold just three press conferences in the first four years of her administration? Why does the president always speak in convoluted sentences that make no sense? Why did the president fly off the handle and sue the Japanese journalist who claimed that she was with Choi Soon-sil’s husband while the ferry Sewol was sinking in 2014, drowning 300 school children? Why did the ruling party randomly host a shamanistic ritual in the halls of the National AssemblyOhhhh, the relief went. Now it all makes sense.

But this brief relief soon gave way to the terrifying realization: actually, it does not make sense. None of this makes any sense.

And now, the author explains in detail the 100% lunatic implications of what’s going on. “Hold on to your hats: severe misjump imminent!”

In an ordinary case of political corruption, the politician is in it for himself. At most, the politician is doing it for his family, or other rich people who may end up helping him later. Obviously, corruption is bad. But this type of self-interested corruption at least gives some measure of predictability. We all know what self-interest looks like. Even though we would prefer that our politicians are not corrupt, at least we know how corrupt politicians behave.

Predicable evil beats unpredictable evil seven ways from Sunday.

Perhaps the PCs should have to struggle against a run-of-the-mill corrupto Noble… who is finally kicked out (yay!) and someone absolutely monstrous takes his place.

So they make a deal with the old corrupto, hiding out with his cronies and his last billion credits: “Help us take out Mr. Walking Abomination, and we’ll help you take back your throne.”

Probably not the best of deals – especially when Vengeful Corrupto gets back on the throne – but sadly, it may be the only choice available to the PCs. A “Better Stalin than Hitler” kind of trade…

But not with Park Geun-hye. Her corruption was not self-interested at all. If anything, her corruption was self-sacrificing in favor of Choi Soon-sil. Among the numerous revelations, I personally found this the most pathetic: Park Geun-hye gave Choi a sizable budget to purchase the presidential wardrobe, and Choi embezzled most of it. Instead of purchasing the clothes that befitted a head of state, Choi outfitted Park Geun-hye with crappy clothes that she had her cronies made with subpar material. There is a video of Choi’s staff smoking and drinking while eating fried chicken, right next to the suit meant for Park Geun-hye. At one point, one of the staff members handled the suit without even wiping chicken grease from his hands, while breathing smoke onto the clothes. Park Geun-hye would wear this suit on her presidential visit with Xi Jinping. For accessories, Choi gave Park the cheap leather purses and clutches that her gigolo designed. This could not have possibly escaped Park’s notice. Even assuming the unlikely possibility Park Geun-hye might not have had the discernment to know firsthand (unlikely because she grew up in the lap of luxury,) the obvious cheapness of Park’s clothes and bags even made the news. Yet nothing came of it. Choi Soon-sil dressed Park Geun-hye liked an unwanted doll, and Park, the president of the country, did not care.

I would deem this impossible behaviour for a Charisma-obsessed Vargr leader.

Even in her apology, Park Geun-hye showed that she still might be under Choi Soon-sil’s hold. What would a self-interested politician would do, if the corruption of one of his cronies was revealed? The politician would sell the crony down the river, denying up and down that he ever knew or interacted with the crony. Such denial would be cowardly and dishonest, but at least it is predictable. But not with Park Geun-hye. She stood in front of the whole country and admitted that Choi Soon-sil fixed her speeches. Instead of cutting ties with her, Park reaffirmed that Choi was an old friend who helped her during difficult times.

This is utterly irrational. Rational people can expect that a corrupt politician may steal money for himself. They can even expect that he may steal for his family. But no one can expect that a corrupt politician would steal money for a daughter of a fucking psychic who claimed to speak with her dead mother. No one, not even the most cynical Korean, expected that the president would refuse to cut ties with Choi Soon-sil, a woman with no discernible talent other than manipulating the president and humiliating her in the process. Koreans may expect that the president would be corrupt, but they never could have expected that the president might be feeble in her mind.

The Vilani-culture types aren’t laughing. After all, in Traveller’s Digest 9, page 27, there is this Hall of Wisdom in the Imperial Palace, where the ghosts holograms of dead Emperors (with very accurate personalty programming) is available for the Emperor to consult.

I sense Secret Ancient Vilani Traditions, enduring for thousands of years.

(And don’t ask what’s going on in the basement of the Archduke of Vland.)

However – as this entire article illustrates – the Solomani had better not gloat. The East has been worshiping/revering/venerating dead people for a real long time now, and even King Saul (along with many, many other Christians who should know better) have disgusted their supposed Lord by playing with dead things and rotten flesh.

The Bible is a public document: the Commandments and the Laws are to be publicly proclaimed. God is a God of the living, and not the dead: the entire point of Christianity is the return of Christ from the dead to the living, leaving behind an empty tomb.

No doubt, the atheists have something to say now.

I will merely point out that the shaman-consulting President Park is an atheist “who is influenced by Buddhism and Catholicism”, the atheistic North Koreans with their Eternal (i.e: dead) President and Eternal (i.e: dead) Leader, and the preference of Communist to embalm their dead founders (Lenin, Mao) for all to pay their respects (i.e: venerate).

As the West continues to efficiently de-Christianize, I fully expect lots more rotting dead things to come tumbling out into public view, in the West as well as the East.

But no matter: the dead are to be left to bury the dead, as Jesus commanded, while the living are to gain the future…

…and leave the dead past to rot, and eventually to burn.


About Alvin Plummer

I'm working to build a better world, a world that blesses Christ and is blessed by Him. I hope that you're doing the same!
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2 Responses to Fun Times with Crazy Nobles

  1. Timothy Newman says:

    We are sad to report the death of Baron Georg Haas XIV, Baron of Shaakir on the planet Eneldun. Before the outbreak of the Rim War, Baron Haas was best known for his residence in a reconstruction of a pre-spaceflight Solomani castle , his eighty mistresses, his habit of having many of his extensive collection of pets that died stuffed and preserved, his genetically- and cybernetically-enhanced lioness Mietzi-Mausi, and his toast, “Confusion to the Party!” A strong Imperial loyalist, he nevertheless remained in place through the period of the Solomani Autonomous Region.
    When the Rim War broke out, Baron Haas disappeared from his home before SolSec could arrest him, and with a group of loyal supporters engaged in a low-level urban resistance campaign against Solomani loyalists. With the support of the local Vilani population he was able to evade capture for years until Imperial forces retook the planet.
    Sadly for Baron Haas, despite his years of hostility to the Solomani Party he was a Solomani himself, and shortly after the planet’s relief a group of radical Vilani forced him to leave the planet. Baron Haas was found dead of a self-inflicted gunshot wound.
    His succession is contested among several of his children.


  2. Alvin Plummer says:

    One of the greatest things about Traveller is that it’s ruled by nobles, ‘men with names… and histories.’

    Some men are more crazier than others.

    “Confusion to the Party!” I wonder if I can get a Solomani Party type to demand that, just once…


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